Financial Talk

As you know, adoption is expensive. International adoption in particular.

While you wait for a referral, it’s a good idea to try saving as much as you can. This way, you can minimize the amount you have to borrow to pay for plane tickets, in-country expenses and professional fees and to make up for the lost salary if you’re going to take parental leave.

Whether you cut back on restaurant expenses, downsize your vacation plans, take a second job, collect donations from generous friends or organize a fundraiser, you’ll see your adoption account slowly swell to a more comfortable level.

The question of how to maintain the value of this money will certainly come up at some point. It has for us.

Yesterday, we met with a financial advisor at our bank. We sat with him and explained what our goal was. Since we don’t know what the timing of our adoption will be, and we have a very specific goal that we cannot concede on, our conditions were pretty rigid. Our basic question was: “Can you help us get the most interest for this money while  a) keeping it fully cashable within a few days notice and b) keeping it completely safe?”

So we looked at all sorts of options. We looked at Guaranteed Investment Certificatess, but cashable ones have ridiculously low interest rates right now. We talked about mutual funds and stocks, but we can’t afford to risk our baby’s homecoming money. We even looked at using our mortgage as a credit line. Although this option has advantages in the long run, it would create a cashflow problem at the time of our travel to Sri Lanka.

After crunching numbers and looking at interest rates for almost an hour, we came to the conclusion that our money was best exactly where it was now.

So here is what we figured was best for someone saving for an adoption who has no idea when they’ll need the money and who will get very little notice:

-          Open up a Tax Free Savings Account – pick the one with the best interest rate that is cashable at any time and guaranteed.

-          Deposit your adoption money in your TFSA until you max out your limit.

-          Deposit any extra money you manage to save into a non-registered savings account – again, pick the one with the best interest rate that is cashable at any time and guaranteed.

Note that if you pull money from your TFSA, you have to wait to the next year before you can refill it. So if you know you’re going to need some of the money in the short term, you might as well deposit this money in your non-registered savings account until you need it.

One more side note: this is true in today’s financial world, with very low interest rates. When things start picking up again, other types of savings account may become more interesting.

And one final piece of advice: don’t take my word for it! If you’ve been putting money aside for your adoption, you owe it to yourself to book an appointment with a financial advisor. You don’t want to find out 2 years down the road that you could be $1000 richer!

Answers from Colombo!

Aaahhhh! That feels so much better!
I have a much better understanding of what is expected of us from Citizenship and Immigration Canada!

After we got this ridiculous email, last week, we had tons of questions.
Pablo tried calling the Canadian High Commission in Colombo. Since we have 11.5hrs difference with Colombo, he had to stay up late to call during their office hours. Only to be told that they did not provide information over the phone and that, if we couldn't find what we needed on their website, we would have to either come to their office in person (yeah right!) or send out an email.
So I sent out a nice, long, detailed email with a list of questions.

I received a reply just a week later (which is pretty good, given that there was a long weekend in there).
And the reply answers all my questions very clearly!

So here is what you need to know if you're using the Immigration process for your adopted child:

• The threat of refusing your application if all documents are not received in 30 days does not apply to international adoption.
• There is a list of required documents specific to each country on the CIC website. They can all wait until you have accepted a child. This way, all forms will have the right name, gender, date of birth, etc.
• If the Schedule A document is listed on your checklist, you don't need to send it for the adoption of a child under 16 years old. If you want, you can send it with NOT APPLICABLE written on it, just to be on the safe side.
• If you need to send out IMM5406 - Additional Family Information, you do need to include yourselves as the parents.

According to email I received, Pablo and I do not need to provide Police Checks or Certificates of Citizenship. But I would confirm with the Visa Office in the country you are adopting from.

If you're going to email your Visa Office, here's one tip I want to share: Include a list of all the documents you understand are required. I did this, all in bullet points, and then asked the Visa Office in Colombo to confirm that the list was correct and complete. This will give you the assurance (and written proof) that you're not missing any important (and time sensitive) document when you travel to pick up your child.

I am feeling sooooo much better now that I have a better understanding of what we need to do! For now, that's pretty much nothing, anyway... The guy did ask for an email update on our adoption every 2 to 3 months, but that won't be a big deal.
And to be fair, after the initial email and phone call, we got some very good service from the High Commision in Colombo.

So here's to clarifying another bit of the process!

Immigration: Which Process to Choose?

In this previous post, I had told you a bit about the different parts of the international adoption process in Canada.
So far, we've completed 1 step out of 3:

- Canadian Process (Home Study)

- Sri Lankan Process (Dossier and Match)

- Immigration Process

Step 2 is well under way (our Dossier is completed and we're waiting for a Match).

And while we wait, we're starting Step 3. The immigration process cannot be completed before you have your kid, but it should be started while you wait. If your country has a particularly quick process, you should probably even start while you're still in the Home Study process... I know some countries also require that the immigration be started before the Dossier can be sent out. It's not the case for Sri Lanka.

Pablo and I have just started looking at this process a few weeks ago. At first, I was severely overwhelmed by the amount (and vagueness) of the information to process. But my naturalized husband was unimpressed and took things into his own hands.

The very first thing to do is to decide on which process to use. Let me explain:

There are 2 ways for your internationally adopted child to become a Canadian citizen. 

1- Immigration Process: This is the old way of doing things. It's also slower and more complicated. It involves sponsoring your child, obtaining a Permanent Resident Visa (which will grant her Permanent Residency upon entry to Canada) from the Canadian visa office in her country of birth, and applying for Canadian Citizenship once the child is in Canada. Travelling outside of the country will be more complicated for your family as long as she remains a Permanent Resident. It may mean obtaining visas for her that you do not need for Canadian citizens. 

2- Citizenship Process: This newer process was put in place to simplify our lives. It's done in 2 parts. First, adoptive parents have to prove that they are eligible. Then they apply for their child's Citizenship. They can then obtain a Canadian passport for him. 

If the automatic Citizenship process is so much simpler, then why doesn't everybody use it?

There are several reasons to go the extra mile and choose the Immigration process. First, adoptive parents may not be eligible to apply for automatic Citizenship. There is a long list of conditions you have to meet... The other good reason to consider the long process is that automatic Citizenship is not hereditary...

If your grandchildren are born in Canada, then that's no problem. But if your kid ends up living abroad and having kids in, say, Zimbabwe, then your grandchildren will not be Canadians. In some cases, the only citizenship your grand-kids could have is that of your child's country of origin. And in extreme cases, your grand-kids could be stateless... Of course, if it's important to him, your child will come back to Canada before his children are born. But this limits his lifestyle options as an adult.

So how exactly do you decide? These are questions you should consider when choosing your process:

- Are you eligible for both processes? The conditions are listed here. 

- How important is it to you to keep doors opened for your child to make his own decisions about where he lives in the future? Does your family culture encourage relocation and long term travels?

- How limiting is your child's country-of-origin's citizenship? If your grand-children end up having citizenship only from a third world country, travelling (even to visit Canada) could be an ordeal for their whole life. If, however, you adopted from a rich country with an easy-to-live-with citizenship, you may decide the consequences of them not being Canadians is bearable.

- How much will you need to travel in the months after you bring your child home? Are you willing to obtain a visa for her every time you travel out of Canada? Approximate processing times for Citizenship Applications are available here.

For all the information about the differences between the Citizenship and the Immigration process, see this page from Citizenship and Immigration Canada's website.

There is detailed information about the first generation rule on this page too, under New Citizenship Law and Adoption. 

And if you end up choosing the long, unclear Immigration process, stay tuned! Pablo and I, although eligible for both, have decided that the risk of our grand-children being Sri Lankan and not Canadian outweighs the extra paperwork. We're going to try to sponsor our Cinnamon Bun and obtain the PR visa for him/her. In the coming weeks, I'll post about how the paperwork is coming along, and what I understand about the process...

How Much Does an Adoption Cost - Home Study

Since we're done with the Home Study bit, I thought it might be interesting for some of you to know how much it has cost us so far.
Discussing money when adopting is always a bit touchy... Some people think that this money is used to buy the child or something. Of course, this couldn't be further from the truth! A lot of administrative work is involved in processing a legal and ethical adoption. And this work is not free.

This said, I have kept the count of every adoption related expense we have made since our decision to adopt and it comes close to $4,000. I guess this is what an average Canadian family should expect to pay for the Home Study process of any International Adoption. From there on, the cost will depend on the country you picked...
These $4,000 include the cost of the Home Study itself (to pay the social worker time and mileage), but also lawyer costs (for documents certification), agency fees, courrier fees, administrative fees (when requesting documents from the government and other institutions), International Adoption training and a (very inexpensive) wedding.

That's pretty close to what we had planned for. I expect the next part of the process (getting a match and travelling to pick up our cinnamon baby) will make these $4,000 look like pocket change!

I Lied to You!

I just got my Birth Certificate by mail. And IT'S IN FRENCH!!!
I already have that, thank you very much! I needed an English copy to avoid having to translate it... Well it turns out I was mistaken. The original act can be filled in French OR in English. The parents decide this. Once this is done, the certificates and copies of the act will always be delivered in the original language. My parents filled my act in French when I was born, so I can't get a certificate in English.

I realize this is of little interest to most of you, but I think I have to correct the information I gave you...

Thank heavens for my professional translator brother-in-law :-D

Quebec Birth Certificate

I got some good news last week. I doubt anybody reading this blog will find this useful, because I have never heard of a Quebecois adopting from SL, but here it is anyway: It is possible to get a Birth Certificate in English directly from the Directeur de l’Etat Civil in Quebec.

This means we won’t have to get mine translated, only Pablo’s! I have ordered my English language Birth Certificate, it should be here in about 3 weeks.

UPDATE: Oups! I had misunderstood Quebec's law... This post is wrong. See the truth here.

What If?

This post is about a difficult issue, which I hope we never have to worry about... Our social worker has raised questions about it, and I called our Ontario agency today to discuss this possibility.

I’m talking about having to refuse a referral.

It happens that the proposed child is not right for the adoptive family, that a doctor specialized in international adoptions raises concerns about the health and development of the child before the adoption takes place and the parents feel that they cannot take proper care of this child.

I wish I could say we are above this. But I have seen and heard of too many good adoptive families who have had to make that excruciating decision, and it would be pretentious (and unfair to the child) to think that we are limitless.

So I have clarified with our Ontario agent what would happen exactly, if this was what life had in store for us.

In Sri Lanka, the children do not get proposed to the agencies. They are matched directly with the adoptive families by Sri Lankan officials. Because of this, there is no way of knowing how far up on the list we are. I am not even sure they refer kids according to the order they received the dossiers...

If we were to refuse a referral, we would not necessarily be proposed the next available child. We would go back into the bucket and wait for Sri Lanka to match us with another kid. There is no telling how much longer we would have to wait.

On the other hand, our agency has never had a family refusing a referral from the Sri Lanka program. That is somewhat reassuring... I realize it is a small program, but it has been around for 11 years.

It’s painful to even think about such issues, but I am grateful that our social worker asked about it. Well informed adoptive families are better suited to make the right decisions.

Why Adoptive Parents Get Less

Our social worker has clarified something that really made no sense to me... In Canada, the federal government has a plan for parents to be able to take some time off work when they have a new child. By law, the employer is required to allow this time off and guarantee the same (or equivalent) position upon return. The new parent is also entitled to Employment Insurance during this period.

This time off is divided into Maternity Leave, which covers 15 weeks and can only be taken by the mother, and Parental Leave, which consists of 35 weeks that both parents can share as they like.

It turns out that Maternity Leave is not available to adoptive parents. When I heard of this, let’s say I found it a little peculiar... We keep hearing how important the first year as a family is for attachment. Yet, we get to stay at home for 15 weeks less than everybody else!

It didn’t make any sense to me, until our social worker explained that, in a domestic adoption, the birth mother gets the 15 weeks Mat Leave, and the adoptive parents get the 35 weeks Parental Leave. That makes sense... A young mother who has just delivered a baby and made the most difficult decision of her life sure needs time to recover! It just happens that international adoptions fall in a crack.

 I wish I could donate those 15 weeks off (and the Employment Insurance pay) to the birthmother of my child, in Sri Lanka... I’m sure she could use it!

An Interesting Bit of Information

Here is something really cool we learned at our International Adoption Seminar: it is legal, in Alberta, to pursue 2 adoptions at once! From what our agent said, Alberta is the only Canadian province to allow it.

What this means is that you could register for 2 programs (say, the United States and Sri Lanka), obtain 2 separate International Adoption Application approvals from the Alberta government and put together 2 different dossiers.

You still cannot have 2 children placed in your home within a 12 months period (unless they are siblings), so the second process would be suspended for a year as soon as you get a referral. But this would allow a quicker second adoption.

For a couple who knows for sure international adoption is how they want to create their whole family, this seems like an awesome option! Of course, it would be a financial challenge, having to pay for both adoptions in a relatively short period, but if you can come up with the money, you can save some time there...

As for ourselves, we’re still too unsure what our family is going to look like to get started on a second process. But I thought this piece of info could be great news for some families... If you’re interested, talk to your Alberta agency, they can tell you all about it!

Oh and, on an other note, it worked!!!!

Interpol clarified!

Now that we have our Interpol checks, I can tell you what it took to get them...
First, you need to go to your local RCMP station and get fingerprints. They will charge $50 per person for that. They will then send your fingerprints to get checked (I think they scan them). You will get RCMP checks, back at your police station, within a few days.
After the prints have been made, they give them to you right away. You can send these to the address (in Ottawa) that is printed at the top, along with a money order or certified check to the Receiver General for Canada for $25 per person.
It took about 3 weeks for us to get our clearance, by mail.

I have read there is another way of doing this, in an L-1 office... I don't know about this, but if anyone does, please leave a comment for my fellow adoptive parents!

Just to Confirm...

Doubt creeps in pretty easily... That’s what happens when you’re not in full control. And control is not a luxury we can enjoy, when it comes to adoption!

I have been exchanging emails with this Canadian adoptive mom who brought her little girl home through a different agency than us. The other day, she wrote about making sure that we met all the requirements, including being married 2 years.

Do you think 2 weeks will do?

We had confirmed we met the requirements with our Ontario agency, and I had an email where they clearly stated that there was no minimal length of marriage required. But this mom had been there, and it was a requirement for them to be married at least 2 years before adopting! That’s when doubt started creeping in. I was staring at our agency’s email that said we were alright, and still pictured us having to change countries and shop for a new agency. Worse: imagine our agent had made a mistake and we realized months into the process that we would have to change countries!

So I sent another email to our agency, insisting on that one particular requirement. And the answer came back yesterday: no minimal length needed (our agent was nice enough not to send me to hell for asking a question she had already answered in writing).

That makes me wonder, though... Why did this family face different requirements? It must have been an agency requirement, but how unfair would it be for an intermediary agency to add obstacles on top of the Sri Lankan demands?

It also made me realize that I will need to learn how to give up control. I hate doubt so much, I almost asked my agent to send me official Sri Lankan documents that would describe the requirements. Not that I don’t trust her, but doesn’t feel natural to not be in full control!

Anyway, if anyone wondered, the answer is out there: there is no SL requirement to be married more than a single day to adopt from there. You have to be legally married though. Most countries don’t recognize common-law spouses.

A Big Sacrifice: Inter-Country Adoption for Canadians Living Abroad

I had a really tough day today...
Pablo and I share the dream of living abroad for a little while. We have wanted this for years, and worked for it to happen. I have made my professional decisions based on this long-term project.
We want to eventually come back to Canada, for our kids to be close to our families.

Well, today, at work, I had an opportunity to apply for a job in Beijing, China. And a pretty good one, at that! I have been waiting for this opportunity for YEARS!
What a timing! Just when our hearts are on their way to Sri Lanka!

I looked at all options, trying to make both projects happen at once. It's allowed, for Alberta Residents Temporarily Living Abroad, to adopt internationally, whether they live in their child's country of origin or any other country. However, international adoption is a very complex legal process. Adding an extra country means adding a whole new dimension of complexity! Even then, complexity does not scare us... But to be considered as an Alberta Resident Temporarily Living Abroad, you need to prove that:

• You used to live in Alberta (which would not be a problem for us)
• You still own a property in Alberta (again, that would have worked for us: my employer would have paid for accommodation in China, allowing us to keep our home)
• You plan on coming back to Alberta within a year or two (proved by a letter from your employer)

... but the posting was for 3 to 4 years. 

I really don't think I could have gotten that status, not until a few years at least. So our adoption really would not be possible if I accepted a job in China. 

So it came down to deciding what our priority was: adopting our cinnamon baby, or fulfilling our dream of living in a new country. 

Of course, there is no question there! We already love that child, even without knowing anything about him (or her)!

I decided to trust that life will take us where we should be. I'm sure more awesome opportunities will come my way, when the right time comes. If I am patient, I will have both my baby and my international career. And  those new opportunities will be better than the one I just let go of...

I guess we are now real parents: we just did our first big sacrifice for our kid :-D

TTC and Adoption

We spoke with both our Alberta and Ontario agents about an eventual pregnancy during the adoption process. The information is difficult to get... In Alberta, there is a law against the placement of two adoptive children (that are not siblings) in a 12 months period. The law is not so clear when it comes to one biological child and one adoptive child.
Of course, in all cases, it is strongly recommended not to adopt while you are pregnant and until your child is 12 months old.

If I accidentally became pregnant during the process, we would have to put our adoption file on hold. When we reopen it, we would have to get an update on our Home Study and on some paperwork. The costs should be less than the original Home Study, but it would still be a hassle.
Where it is not yet clear is if I became pregnant after we have accepted a referral. I would not want to lose our adoptive child then!
With all the info in hands, we discussed the issue, and it looks like we are going to stop trying to conceive. We don't want to take the risk of seeing our adoption slipping through our fingers...