Thursday, November 8, 2012

It Could be Worse!

Gina, over at One in Five Million, has written this post which came at a perfect time for me. I needed to be reminded that things are really not that bad...
So I've tried to give this some thoughts and put things in perspective.

Sure, this family building journey is taking far more time than I ever imagined I could survive like this. But did you know that, in some cultures, men who are not able to conceive with their first wife are allowed (sometimes encouraged) to take a second wife? I am so grateful that Pablo is sharing this journey with me!

Sure, I feel somewhat left behind while all my friends and relatives are building their families. But some women survive multiple miscarriages, failed adoption, even still birth. I can only imagine the pain of welcoming another baby in your circle when yours is missing...

Sure, my life plans are being pushed around. I really did not imagine myself still in this exact same place, a few years ago. Some of my life projects may end up falling off the shelf as the years go by. But the status quo could be much worse. I have a home I love, in the sweetest small town in the whole world; I have a good, challenging job; and I'm married to my best friend.

Sure, the program closure and very slow reopening feels a bit like salt in an open wound. But we are so lucky that we have access to programs like this. Single parents, gay couples, people with certain medical conditions or a more complicated past have a much harder time finding a country they can adopt from.

Lately, the hopelessness has blurred my vision a bit. I need to remember these things and snap out of my pity party!


  1. You are totally right. It is easy to dwell on the unhappy things, but it is important to remind youself to always count your blessings.

  2. Hi Gen,
    Good for you for trying to stay positive. It is very hard to do at times, when we are hearing nothing, but soooooo important in this journey. Like Gina said, we are blessed to live where we live. Having visited waiting children and having them shout, "Take me Miss, take me!" sure gives one a new prespective on life. Hang in there my friend,

  3. Thank you for your comments, girls.
    I hope this post brings some comfort to you too, as you are both going through some very emotional times..