Monday, February 18, 2013

How to Fake Patience - Tip #6

Adoption is stressful. It's scary, and painful. And it's a very personal life challenge.
We all cope in a different way.

Sometimes, we may tell ourselves how we want to react, but we can't always make it work.

If you are like me, you sometimes feel guilty for not being the stoic, graceful person you would like to be. If that's the case, well this tip is for you...

How to Fake Patience - Tip #6: Praise yourself!

Whenever you beat yourself up over your reactions and coping mechanisms, try to name at least one thing that makes you proud.

Feeling guilty about your jalousy over your girlfriend's third pregnancy since you started your journey? That's fine. But take a minute to pat yourself on the back for being able to maintain this friendship in such painful conditions!

Beating yourself up over that fight you had with your partner over delay in filling out a form for the adoption? So normal! But you certainly deserve some praise for making your relationship work through this horrendous stress!

If you need to, say these things out loud, or keep a list on the fridge. After all, you are amazing! A less amazing person would not have made it this far without breaking a few relationships, losing their job after a few public breakdowns or being accused of murdering their social worker*!


* Just to be clear, we love our social worker...

3 comments:

  1. Hi Gen,

    I'm Rosa, I’ am Italian, I’m a friend of Elisa.
    I always read your Blog!
    In Italy we learned that the Department of Probation in Sri Lanka in a few days will communicate the list of adoptable children by foreigners.
    On 11 February, we have also written to the Department of Probation, for precise information, but they have not yet answered.

    Can you ask your Adoption Agency if they confirm this news?

    I hope to hear from you soon

    Thanks thank you very much!

    Rosa

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  2. I used to think that if I have my biological child first they will keep me busy while waiting for my adoption to go through, but I remember reading Gina's blog a while back and she said that she still felt impatient even though she had a little one to keep her busy... Keep the tips coming, I love them!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Mia! Those tips are helping me too, just thinking about ways to make the wait more bearable is helpful :)
      And I think a lot of these tips apply to parents who are waiting for their biological kids, too... You also must be impatient to meet your baby!
      Gen

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