How to Fake Patience - Tip #5

Don't know what to do with yourself as you wait for your child?
This is How to Fake Patience - Tip #5:
Take up crochet! Or knitting, or sewing, or woodworking. You get the idea...

Get yourself a book, a class or an online video explanation and start handcrafting baby things!

And if you don't want to see baby things in your home, then make something for someone else. Start something that will take you a while, like a blanket or a sweater. Believe me, it kills time!

It has taken me months to make these few items. I'm working on a blanket now.

How to Fake Patience - Tip #4

When you are waiting to adopt, you have a lot of time on your hands, and money tends to run a little short.

And when the clock is ticking and hours feels like years, you have to keep busy to keep your sanity! But how do you use wisely the extra time while still saving for your adoption?

Here goes How to Fake Patience – Tip #4:

Shop for second hand children items.
You are going to need everything from clothes to toys, maybe a crib, a stroller and a change table, when your child comes home. And these things are really expensive.
If you feel able to, go to community sales where moms sell their used items. Every now and then, go online and look for good bargains. Kijiji, Craigslist and eBay can all be good places to start. If you don't want to buy used items, you can still keep an eye on your favorite stores and look for sales on children clothes and furnitures. Register for draws and blog giveaways.

You don't have to look at the stuff every day, you can keep it stored for now. When you finally get your referral, you'll be happy you started early and don't have to rush all the shopping at the last minute.

I realize this tip is not for everybody. Before you start buying, you need to consider whether you trust the process will be successful and how you would manage your collection is it didn't work out.

Pablo and I have allowed ourselves to indulge in the fun of shopping for baby because we truly believe we will have children one day (whether from Sri Lanka or from somewhere else). And we feel like, if everything fails and we end up not having children, giving away our baby items will not be the main source of our heartbreak. The process of deciding to give up our project will be.

So, if it feel right for you, shop away! It's so sweet when you make a good find!

Washable Wipes

As you know, we have started gathering baby stuff. We have already decided we would like to use cloth diapers. We are doing our best to reduce our impact on the environment and will keep doing so once we are parents.
One thing we have heard can make a different is using washable cloth wipes for the diaper change. I figure we're going to do poopy laundry anyway, this is not much different!

So the last time we bought new sheets for our bed, I decided to keep the old ones and cut them in wipe-size squares (that's about 8X8 inch). I don't know if the material will be absorbant enough, but I figure we have nothing to lose by trying!

I thought I'd share the tip. If you want to try washable wipes, start collecting your old clothes that are no longer usable early during your wait. This way, you'll have plenty of wipes by the time your baby is there!

A Big Piece

I have been on the lookout for baby furniture for a while, now.
Did you ever stop to calculate how much having a baby will cost your family? There's the cost of the adoption, of course, but diapers, formula, clothes, nursery furniture, stroller, car seat and high chairs aren't included in the deal. And it adds up!
I've looked for new cribs in stores, they cost up to $600 where we live! Given that we'll only need a crib for a few years, at the most, that's a pretty high yearly rate!

I finally found what I was looking for on Kijiji, last week.
This family was selling their convertible crib for $125. I went over and picked it up, and I couldn't believe the shape it was in! 2 kids have used it, and the wood is not even marked. Not a single tooth mark or scratch!
I'm not posting a picture because it is unassembled and nicely stacked behind our washing machine.
This particular crib can be converted into a toddler bed or a twin size bed. I've looked it up on the Internet, and new cribs like this cost around $500.
We'll get a new mattress for it when we get the baby's room ready.
I'm so happy with my find :-)

If you're going to consider used cribs, make sure you read through this web page from Health Canada. It's important to obtain model number and manufacturing year before you commit to buying. You can then check for recalls and make sure the crib was made after the new rules came out in 1986.

The Advantages of Cloth Diapering

Picture from http://aprilmackinnon.wordpress.com/

Pablo and I have decided to use cloth diapers on our Cinnamon Bun. It’s not to say we’ll never use a disposable, especially when we’re living in a hotel room in Sri Lanka, but we’d like to use cloth as much as we can.

We’ve already got 3 cloth diapers: 2 used that I bought at a sale back in May, and 1 brand new that little T. brought as a gift for her cousin.

There are 2 good arguments for cloth diapers:

1-      Money: Cloth diapers cost ~$300-$500 to start, plus the cost of washing (energy, soap and water). That’s probably less than $1000 in total. Disposable diapers cost ~$2000-$3000 over the time a baby uses diapers.

2-      Environment: This is not as cut-and-dry as you’d think… If cloth diapers are bought brand new, used only for one child before being discarded, and machine dried, the environmental cost of manufacturing, energy and water pollution may very well equate that of manufacturing plastic diapers. If your electricity company produces from a coal plant, machine drying diapers is an important air pollutant. But if you’re going to buy used diapers, reuse your cloth diapers for your second child (or a cousin or friend) and/or line dry your diapers, then you’ll be keeping a few tons of waste from the landfills!

I found this article on the Canadian Government website.

And while we’re at it, I think I’d like to get some reusable wipes and liners... We’ll just try to make it a habit to hang all that stuff to dry! Is there anything cuter than a line full of colourful diapers? And our dry Mountain climate will help anyway!

More Stuff for our Collection

I have been bargain hunting for a while now. I keep an eye on Craigslist and Kijiji. It doesn't always work out, though. A few weeks ago, I had found a really inexpensive crib. I phoned and asked for it to be kept aside until later that same week, when I would have time to go pick it up. When I called back the night before I was going to pick it up, the guy had sold it to someone else... Oh well!

This weekend, however, I had two good finds.

I found an umbrella stroller for $5.

 

 And a set of 8 glass bottles with different size teats for $25.

This weekend, there was also a sale for used baby and children items. I was hoping to find used furnitures. A crib and changing table maybe. But it was mainly clothes and toys. Still, I found a few good items for the space behind our washing machine (did I tell you that's where we're storing our baby stuff while we wait?).

For a total of $75, I got:

• 2 sets of crib sheets
• 2 receiving blankets
• 2 washable diapers (different designs, to try them out)
• 2 bibs
• 5 onesies
• 5 pajamas
• 1 pair cotton pants
• 1 pair jeans
• 1 short
• 1 sun hat
• 5 little cardboard books
• 1 bath book
• 1 grown-up book on baby development during the first year (it even talks about adoptive parenting!)
• 1 sippy cup
• 4 baby spoons

The clothes are all sized between 6 months and 18 months. It turned out to be really difficult to find gender neutral clothes for 6-18 months old! There's a lot of gender neutral stuff for newborns, but it seems like as soon as parents know they have a boy or a girl, it's all blue tractors and pink butterflies! As soon as I saw something yellow, green or white, I'd get it :D

 

I've made a little back-of-the-envelope calculation and we would probably have paid right around $350 for all this, brand new. It cost us a total of $105 used... It's definitely worth the trouble of buying used stuff, especially since we have nothing but time in this process!

Gina's Gift

View this book on Amazon

When I met with Gina, the other day, she brought me a gift. Is she sweet or what?
She had find this children's book at her bookstore and had gotten one for her kid, and one for mine!

It is such a beautiful book! If you can find it, go get it for your adopted child...

The book tells the story of bringing a child home. It's written in the form of a nursery rhyme, with simple words appropriate for very young children.

But what I really love about Happy Adoption Day! is the pictures. Each page is filled with a beautiful, artistic painting in vivid colors. The family that is pictured is caucasian parents and an asian boy, but some pictures show other families, caucasian and also black.

If you'd like to see what the inside of the book looks like, have a look on Amazon. If you click on the picture of the book cover, you can see the first pages. I'm sure you'll love it too!

Thank you Gina!

Our Collection

If you remember, I said a few weeks ago that I wanted to start gathering baby stuff when I find really good deals, to make use of the long wait.

We have found a little space behind the washing machine. It's completely useless, because it's so hard to reach. That's perfect for storing stuff we won't need for another 2 years!

So, just for fun, here is our collection so far:

My sister and brother-in-law gave us a few accessories that they had received in double. My week-old niece didn't seem to mind donating them to her future cousin!




Then, after I returned from Australia, our good friends C. and N. where here with their little X. I just realized I didn't blog about this! They spent a week at our place. It was great!
In addition to spending time with them (which is always a treat), it was awesome to have an 11 months old at home with us, just after spending 2 weeks with a newborn. We asked to be matched with a child no more than 12 months old, so this really gave us a feel for the range we can expect! We now have a better idea of how big or how developed our child could be when we get him/her. We know he could be starting to stand up, but that walking is very improbable. We know that, if we get a child close to 12 months old, she'll need some time to adapt to our language because, even if X. doesn't talk yet, he understands a lot... Also, it was great because X. is formula fed. So we got a crash course on what was needed to feed our baby!
Anyway, I disgress...

When they came here, they brought most of their stuff (stroller, car seat and such). But C. had found a high chair for $25 on Craig's List. So we got it for little X, and now it's part of our collection! It's a pretty sweet one, fully adjustable and all. I looked it up, a new one like this would cost at least $80...

The last bit got here this week. It's a sling that I got for free using an online promotional code given by a friend. I just had to pay shipping. It looks nice, doesn't it?
I don't know how well-designed it is (you really can't know until you've tried it, anyway). But if it is comfortable enough, I think I will enjoy this very much. I'm not a big fan of big, bulky strollers. I think carrying our cinnamon bun against us will be awesome.

So far, that's what we've gathered. Not too bad, if you consider we're not even officially waiting!

I'm keeping an eye on Craig's List, and watching for sales. I usually hate shopping, but this makes me feel a tiny bit more in control. And right now, every once of control is much welcome!

Stuff

Having a baby requires equipment. A whole lot of it!

If you have a 4-stories mansion with a backyard as big as a National Park, this is probably not a big deal for you. 

But we're going to have to decide what we really need and what we can fit in our house without having to throw away our own bed...

So I used my time at my sister's and brother-in-law's to evaluate what I thought was absolutely necessary and what was not.

So, here's what I think you really, absolutely, completely can't live without when you bring your baby home:

     - A crib.

     - Clothes. Lots of them!

     - Some mean of transporting the baby (often a stroller, at least a sling, pouch or back-pack carrier).

     - A car seat.

     - A high chair - you won't need this just yet if you're adopting a newborn, though.

     - Formula, a full set of bottles and teats and cleaning equipment, if you're going to bottlefeed.

     - Baby shampoo, baby skin cream, baby laundry soap

     - Diapers (either washable or disposable) with wipes. Hundreds of wipes. Wait... make that Thousands.

     - Linen for the crib, a little towel and facewash for the bath, blankets, bibs.

     - Basic baby accessories (nail cissors, nose pump, thermometer, etc)

Here is some more nice-to-have stuff:

     - A baby bath - much more comfortable for you than using the sink or the bath.

     - A changing table - again, more comfortable than kneeling on the floor and more convenient than a          countertop.

     - A rocker or bouncer so that baby can be with you without being in your arms.

     - Teething toys, rattles, stuffed toys.

     - Baby books - both cardboard books and plastic books for the bath.

     - A sterilizer for the bottles - quicker than boiling water in a pot.

     - If you choose to breastfeed, a breastfeeding cushion, breast pump and, if needed, a system to complement with formula.

     - A nice diaper bag that you can keep fully furnished and just grab when you're going out.

     - A portable changing mat, and maybe some disposable ones as well.

     - A lifebook - you can make your own, but they also sell adoption books that are a bit like traditional baby books with entries specific to adoption.

     - Pacifiers, if you decide you'd like one.

     - Baby monitors.

     - A freezer full of healthy food to help you keep up with the crazy pace!

And then there's the travel material, too...

I'd like to make an opportunity out of the excruciatingly long wait and try to slowly pick up our baby stuff either pre-loved or on sale. If you buy everything new and without investing too much time in shopping, the bill can go up really quickly!

Having baby stuff at home may be a little difficult, but I'm looking forward to seeing us more as expecting parents. I still haven't discussed it with Pablo though... We'll see what he says :-)